PUTTING UP THE WRITING UMBRELLA

In addition to using a cohesive structure, you can create an intricate design from first line to last by placing your message under a idea umbrella. Before or after you write your list, find a metaphor to weave throughout the document or an anecdote to refer to several times. Then, on your list, show how the umbrella idea connects to several or all of your points. This works particularly well with training and sales and marketing materials and instructions.Let’s look more closely at umbrella ideas, starting with metaphors and similes — those wonderful devices you probably recall from English class.

Perhaps the most popular metaphor ever is “Love is a rose” Love, of course, isn’t a rose, but the image conjures both beauty and pain, which, in this era of instant marriage and rampant divorce is pretty accurate.In business writing you are likely to encounter metaphors and similes such as these:

Our mattress is a soft cloud floating you off to sleep. Today’s economy is like a cobra waiting to strike.

Regardless of which you use, metaphors and similes create better documents.

Without metaphor. To avoid backlog that hurts our organization, don’t let papers collect on your desk.

With metaphor. Papers collecting on your desk are like rust corroding our organization.

The reasons for their effectiveness, however, run deeper than you might think. Here are some:

• Image. By using a cloud, cobra, or any other vivid image, you give readers an effective way to remember your message. Think about the advertisements you see on television, on billboards, or in magazines. Whether the ads feature Calvin Klein’s controversial nymphets or Coors’s mountain scenes, you recall the picture even before the product name.

• Association. Whenever you write, your mission is the same: to involve your readers as directly and completely as possible. By using metaphors and similes you allow the readers to associate their own experiences, memories, or connotations.
• Interesting language . Regardless of the image, you’re bound to use unusual — and refreshing — language with metaphors and similes. This will help distinguish your message from others, and in the process will interest the reader.

Warning. Avoid using tired metaphors and similes such as these from an MIS department:

Using new technology can be like drowning in quicksand. That’s why all employees should attend the computer training sessions every Thursday afternoon in the McNeil Conference Room.

In the software battlefield, developers must fight many battles before winning the war.

Even readers whose knowledge of the written word comes from cereal boxes are familiar with metaphors using battlefields and quicksand. Those images are flat. Strong alternatives include:

Using new technology can be like following a complicated road map. Rather than lose your way, attend the computer training sessions. . . .

In the software competition, developers must play for many innings before winning the game. The first, and most critical, round is with the marketability of their products.

However, be careful of creating self-conscious metaphors and similes. For example, this line will certainly overwhelm the reader:

Every customer is like a long-lost relative visiting from the Far East.

Instead, keep it simple and write:

Every customer is like a visiting relative.
Or, more simply:

Every customer is like family.

Now, take a look at the following list and the press release a PR writer created from it:

1. Business must dress nicely — compare to well-dressed person
2. Tips for results — image out of closet
3. Sessions
4. Bio and prices — runway for success

For: Imaging Consultants 16 West Street, Cranston, NY 20012

Contact: John Phillips 555-4321

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

Imaging Consultants Show Businesses How to Really Dress

Cranston, NY, May 19, 1998 — Business owners aren’t the only ones who have to dress nicely — their businesses do too. That’s why, in this two-day conference at Hiner’s Center in the downtown financial district, Imaging Consultants is showing entrepreneurs how to transform underdressed offices into tailored workplaces.

“We’re trying to show small business owners how to take image out of the closet and into the workplace,” says Imaging Consultants trainer Sue Reed. “We give them valuable tips about how to maximize office space to accommodate more employees, use color to make clients feel comfortable, and pick furniture that is comfortable, functional, and professional.”

Some of the sessions include “Finding Your Own Image,” “Improving the Office Step-by-Step,” and “Behind the Walls — Creating Productive Space.” Participants receive handouts, charts, before-and-after samples, and other materials. They are also encouraged to bring photos of their offices for complimentary sessions with Imaging Consultants’ staff.

Imaging Consultants has been helping businesses walk the runway to success for over a decade. Its clients include Stonewall Bank, The Chamber of Commerce, The Business Center Supply Company, and other local and regional organizations. Says Imaging Consultants president Jon Woo: “We don’t believe business owners need to dig up loans so they can have a professional-looking office. All our events and services are geared to help clients look good through financially sensible choices and not outrageously high prices.”

Individuals interested in Imaging Consultants’ conference can receive more information by calling 555-666-6666.

Use these as metaphors in your message:

TRY THIS! Using the chart that follows, list a topic you write about every day, such as a product name, an idea, or a service that is important to your organization. Then write an outstanding characteristic — a physical attribute, a result it brings, or an unusual feature. Next think of an object, any object, that shares that characteristic and create your metaphor. Don’t like your object? Think it’s cliché? Then write several others until you find one that works.